Loving a Friend Who Sometimes Skewers You - Wellbeing Wisdom Tiny Bites

Do you have a dear friend whose tone of voice or words to you sometimes feels like an indictment of who you are? Most of us have a friend like that – someone who would do anything in the world for you, is there when you need them, and occasionally sounds like they seriously disapprove of you over something trivial.

I remember when I was sharing a hotel room with a friend, hadn’t finished getting dressed yet, and the friend told me that my hair looked awful. Her tone of voice made it seem like bad hair equaled bad human.

Do you have a friend like that?

If the friendship is important to you, do what I did: remind yourself that your friend probably learned that tone of voice from a disapproving parent. They’re using it on you without remembering how bad it felt when it was used on them. You can try to help them understand how that tone feels to you, or you can let it go and chalk it up to “everyone’s entitled to be human” and embrace their human-ness, as you know they usually embrace yours.

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