How to Quit Reacting to Mean People - Wellbeing Wisdom Tiny Bites

Is there someone in your life who has to be there – a parent or a sibling or a boss – who behaves in a way that’s upsetting to you?

It can be very hard to be around some people, especially when we feel there’s no way to not be around them, and still maintain a sense of wellbeing. You can do it, and it may take a lot of mental gymnastics to accomplish it. Your wellbeing is worth it, though, right?

Here’s one way to help yourself feel better around challenging people: study them. Yep, pay attention to how they behave and make up stories in your head about how they learned to behave like that. For instance, if you have a co-worker who likes to make pointed remarks about your looks that feel like daggers to you, what if she had a parent who did that to her when she was growing up? How would you have felt to be 8 years old, delighted with the dress you had on, and hearing nothing but disapproval from the lips of someone you loved? Ouch, right?

When you can make up a compassionate reason for your co-worker’s bad behavior, you can make it about them, not about you. And that feels so much better!

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